The 40 Over 40 Project
Sara Christie,
Age 46
Tell me about yourself and how you feel about being a woman over the age of 40.
I dreaded hitting the forties. Every year that put me closer loomed over me like a dark cloud. I just knew my younger years would be gone forever, youth would no longer be in my grasp, and I would have to live inside an old woman's body. But then something beautiful happened: I turned forty. Life as I knew it did change, but instead of changing into the distorted version of the woman I thought I would have to settle for, I found it was the beginning of a beautiful, exciting adventure to a woman I am proud of. Something changes in a woman when she hits her forties. We no longer find ourselves consumed with what others think of us or focusing on all the perceived "imperfections" about ourselves. There is just something that is freeing about Rather, I became comfortable for the first time in my own skin. The very milestone in my life that I had feared ended up being the cornerstone for the next chapters of my life and it has been amazing. I don't look at my wrinkles, my stretchmarks, my grey hair as imperfections but rather as badges of honor that I wear proudly. I've raised 3 amazing kids and have a beautiful family that I'm so grateful for. I have a rewarding career that I'm passionate about and look forward to every day. I have made amazing life long friends and getting ready to marry a man who completes me. Most importantly, I have a God who loves me and has blessed me. Like so many women in their forties, I've endured several of life's curveballs and prevailed through God's grace and mercy. Forties isn't a death sentence. It's a new adventure with a more mature perspective that I didn't have prior. I'm 46 and I'm fabulous!
When do you feel most confident?
This is a great question! Confidence for me is something that has evolved over the years. If you would have asked me this question years ago, I would have said something like "When I'm dressed up, make up is perfect, and my hair is just right. When people notice and compliment me". Now, I have a completely different perspective. Confidence is a choice, it shouldn't be something that is subjective. We often base our confidence on what others think of us. While it does feel good when others compliment us, it can tank our confidence when someone says the slightest negative thing. I choose to feel confident every day, whether I'm dolled up or bumbing it :-) I've learned that choosing to be confident rather then depending on others perception of us creates a beauty within a woman that causes her to beam and personify beauty on a whole new level. That is true confidence.
How did your painful times give you the gift of resilience?
The beauty of being in my forties is being able to recognize life's painful moments as periods of growth that had to happen for me to become the woman I am today. One of those painful moments that impacted my life in so many ways happened in 2013, I was diagnosed with Chiari Malformation, a brain defect that can be debilitating and in many cases, can be fatal. I went from being a healthy 38 year old one day, to barely functioning the next. My vision and balance was impacted and I had daily migraines and constantly dizzy among many other symptoms. I was presented with a choice, fight for my life or become consumed with self pity and succumb to my diagnosis. I chose to fight which quickly became a daily battle. Word quickly spread about my condition and before long, I had hundreds if not thousands of people praying for me. I was floored by the support and generosity of my coworkers, friends, and family. What should have been one of the scariest moments of my life ended up being one of the most motivating. When you are confronted with your own mortality, it changes you. Suddenly, the things I thought were important took backstage to the things that should have been my focus all along: God, my family, my friends, and my health. I reprioritized my life which in turn created a new found happiness within me and gave me purpose. I realized that this life I was blessed with was not all about me. It was about serving others. It was about giving and not taking. That change of perspective was exactly what I needed. I realized happiness was a choice and not dependent on materialistic things, people, or circumstances. It wasn't something that could be stolen from me, but only something I could give away. My encouragement to others since that time is don't wait to have brain surgery to change the way you think like I did. Choose happiness, choose confidence, no matter what age you are.
What advice would you give your younger self?
If I could go back in time and talk to my younger self, I would tell her this: Do not base your decisions on other's opinions or perception of you. Once you do, you allow them to live your life for you and you will miss so many wonderful experiences that life brings. Confidence and happiness are choices that you make, not feelings. Choose to be confident and choose to be happy. Appreciate each day you are blessed with because no one is promised a tomorrow. Always trust in God. He is going to carry you through some of the darkest moments in your life. He will never leave your side.
What would you tell other mature women about stepping out of their comfort zone and doing a photo shoot?
The fear of the unknown can be overwhelming, even paralyzing, but it doesn't have to be. Comfort zones are an imaginary safe zone that we create for ourselves. To expand that safe zone, you have to be daring to step outside of it. This photo shoot was definitely outside my comfort zone however the experience ended up being inspiring, even freeing and I'm so glad I dared to do something that typically would have felt awkward and unnatural to me. Looking at the final reveal and seeing my photos had a profound impact on me. I didn't notice the imperfections that I had spent so many years criticizing myself for. Rather, Kelsey was able to bring to light the courageous, independent, vibrant person I am on the inside and capture the very essence of who I am today in picture form. Every woman should be able to gaze at a photo that embodies who they are and allow our "imperfections" to transform into badges of honor that we can be proud of.