Tell me about yourself.

First and foremost, I am a lover of Jesus. I am a 54 year old mother of 5 boys (whose ages range from 17-32) and YaYa (grandmother) to 7 (6 boys one girl) under 7 and blessed to be married to the most awesome man on the planet. In addition to my biological loves, I have a lot of “bonus” children who call me Momma. My passions in addition to my family are: leading worship at my church, and leading my women’s life group. Also, I have a servant’s heart. Serving and Volunteering are my heartbeat. Speaking of heart beats, I have always considered myself to be healthy and strong but, 6 months ago after a period of sustained V-tach, I ended up going through 6 heart procedures in 7 days one of which was an ICD implantation. I have struggled in ways that I never could have imagined but, found more blessings than I could have ever dreamed over these past 6 months. God is so good to me.

How has your photo shoot experience shaped how you view yourself?

I don’t think I have ever really have thought much of myself much in terms of who I am except as I relate to others. I am a Wife, a Mom, a YaYa, a daughter, a sister, an aunt, a friend, you get the idea. But, to think of myself in terms of just how I relate to myself makes me uncomfortable. I’ve never felt that photos of just me would be worth the expense, and Not sure who would want them. But, this opportunity pushed me to think about myself in terms relative to who I am, and to realize that I am “good enough”. Through this process, I have realized that not only is it okay, it is also liberating to do something for myself. You know, to in some way celebrate me, and the fact that I am STILL here.

What message would you like to give other women that are going through a difficult time in life and might not feel worthy?

This question made me weep. Women are so hard on themselves. I would say: Sweet One you are worthy!! God has created you for this time in the world. He has a special purpose that only YOU can fulfill and that makes you precious, that makes you worthy of being celebrated!! If you are stuck in a rut of self doubt, lift up your chin, step outside of your comfort zone and shake things up by trying something that you wouldn’t normally do. You will like yourself for it. Remember that your value in life doesn’t increase or decrease based on someone else’s opinion of you. If you look at yourself through your own eyes, and based upon your own strength, you will never feel good enough. But, in the eyes of our Heavenly Father you are beautiful, wise, and wonderful. Never forget how far He has brought you, and trust that He is going to continue to lead you to great things.

What advice would you give your younger self?

I would say, “One day you are going to be able to look back and laugh about a lot of this. Don’t take yourself so seriously, learn to laugh at yourself now.” I would say, “Do not fall into the trap of comparing yourself with others. There is no fruit in that. Invest in people not things.” I would want my younger self to know that you will never regret trying new experiences or doing things differently. Even if things turn out wrong, or don’t go well, you will learn something valuable. There is no replacement for experiencing life, and you will only regret the doors that you don’t walk through. I would advise myself to speak my mind more often without being afraid of what others might think. “Laugh without fear of the future”- Proverbs 31:25

What would you tell other women about stepping out of their comfort zone and doing a photo shoot?

I would say: Please do it. I understand that it may seem daunting, and you may not feel like you are “good enough” or “deserving” of such a thing, but you are! If you are like me you might even be thinking, “Who would even want a picture of me?” Hah! But, those who love you will be so glad that you believed in yourself enough to do it. If not for your loved ones do it for yourself to empower yourself, to find the remnants of the brave, beautiful girl who still exists inside of you. When you find her you will be so glad that you did the photographs.